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Today’s blog topic is my favorite: the bedroom, the most neglected space in the home.  This is the space where many people think they can be untidy and messy because no one sees it.  But to me, this is the space that we should take care of because it brings out our sensuality.  Your bedroom should feel inviting and exciting for passionate love-making, but at the same time promote calmness for a good night’s sleep.  So let me ask you this – on a scale of 1-10, (10 being great and 1 being not great at all) how would you rate your bedroom?  If it’s not a 10, then what would it take to make it a 10?

In my experience of decorating and designing bedroom spaces over the past 15 years including my own, here are the top 5 things that are love life and sleep killers…

1. Having a single night stand or two un-identical ones.  You should have identical night stands and bedside lamps to promote balance and respect in your relationship.  If you are single, you still need two identical night stands.  It is important to live as if you are already in a relationship.  For me as a woman, if a guy does not have two identical night stands in his bedroom, it means that he does not care to be in a committed relationship and if he was in a relationship, he would not be as thoughtful and considerate as a partner.

2. Clutter.  If you do not feel comfortable sleeping in the messy chaos of your own bedroom, then why would anyone else want to sleep there with you?  Would you want to see all that clutter before you go to bed and then see it again first thing when you wake up?

3. Electronics and technology.  Honestly, I think the majority of couples and single men I know have a TV, stereo system, computers and laptops, or some kind of electronics in the bedroom.  Once the lights are off, you should be in the bedroom for some passionate hanky panky or simply just to get some restful sleep…make sense?  Your emails can wait!  Besides, what are you doing bring the TV room or the office into your bedroom in the first place?

4. Mirrors.  A mirror facing the bed directly or positioned where you can see yourself while sitting or lying in bed is very bad Feng Shui. It depletes your personal energy when you need it the most: at night while your body is resting and restoring its energy for the next day. A mirror in your bedroom also represents having a third party involved in your love life.  This could be work, health issues, in-laws, friends, or even an affair, none of which are good for a loving and healthy relationship.

5. Bad color and pattern choices for bed spreads.  When it comes to Feng Shui, the secret is the balancing of Yin (feminine-calm) and Yang (masculine-active) energy.  Your bedroom’s purposes are rest and activity (sensual and passionate activity).  Having bed spreads that are black, brown, navy, green, gray, strong blue, plaids, checks, or funky patterned bed sheets will kill your love life. Furthermore, those prints and colors do not promote restful sleep either.  This to me is common sense, but I have seen so many people use these colors in their bedrooms, especially men!

Creating an inviting, relaxing, and sensual bedroom is easy.  All you have to do is have nice mood lighting, soft music, lavender-patchouli scented candles, red, peach or pink flowers, and 100% cotton sheets in white and soft colors or floral patterns along with high-quality down pillows and comforters.  Make sure to balance the yin and yang (feminine and masculine energy).  You do not want too much of one energy over the other.

There are many more tips I can give you related to this topic, but this is a simple list to help get you started. Below I have included some examples of balanced bedroom décor and accents.  Need help?  Contact me…


At the Edgewater Hotel in Seatle, Washington.  It is almost perfect.  I would make the other night stand identical, add some fresh red flowers by the bedside as well as 2 red candles, take out the teddy bear, and add another red pillow for even number.  The natural material bed posts enhances warmness to the space.


At the Shangri-La Hotel, Tokyo where I was staying back in November.  If it was my bedroom, I would make the bed a little fluffier and not as perfectly in place, add 2 red candles in vanilla-patchouli scent, and of course, some fresh red flowers and remover the clock and the phone.

This is an example of flowers that I would fill my bedroom with depending on what is in season.

This is an example of flowers that I would fill my bedroom with depending on what is in season and this is my side of the bed.


The nude male torso sculpture adds a nice touch to the male side of the bed.


This is the kind of sculpture you should have in your bedroom.

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Paintings like this one from Stefan Kuhn are the perfect art for your bedroom wall to promote passion and sensuality.



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